The Hammer and the Nail

My brother and I had a very interesting conversation one day about the different personalities of the men in our lives and he used an interesting analogy.  There are three types of men.  The "Hammers", the "Nails", and the "Nails who think they are Hammers".

A hammer is considered to be strong and powerful.  There are two faces to a hammer - one that provides immediate direction and guidance through thick and thin, the other face allows for second chances, using rigid edges to pull the nail out of "the hard spots" for redirection.  It does not take orders from the nail, but is humbled by a power superior and mightier than itself.  It is a blind leader.  Then there is the nail.  The nail is weaker of the two. It would rather be given a direction than decide on its own where to go or what to do.  The nail cannot and will not stand up against the hammer, but instead adheres to every command. Even though it is built with metal, it does not realize its own strength. It is a blind follower.


In human terms, firstly we have "Hammers". Strong willed, authoritative, disciplined...they are born leaders. Some are arrogant, and mean spirited, using their traits as a form of dictatorship focusing only on themselves and their well being.  Others are positive and uplifting, constantly encouraging the weak to rise to success.   Hammers set the rules and expect them to be followed. They are more comfortable running their own show, following their own dreams and living life to the fullest.  Purely alpha-male by nature, they deal negatively to too much outside influence.  Most of the time, they are wise enough to understand the people around them and provide a constant source of inner strength to live out one's true calling in life.  Although tough, most people with "Hammer" tendencies are sensitive to the needs of others around them, specially the ones feeding off their energy. 

Then we have the "Nails", relatively weaker individuals that give in to authority quickly. They have visions and dreams, but allow it to be directed by people of value in their lives. They are followers at heart, and sometimes get confused between influences from God versus man.  They have strength like no other, but is unnoticed by themselves and the people around them. Nails are not wired to be Hammers, yet they have potential to be Hammer-like in their decision making and presence. Though strong willed and hard headed when needed, they prefer to blen in to the community and society that surround them.  A person with nail-like traits will flourish and grow immensely with positive hammer influence. On the other hand, when met with arrogance and constant negative vibes, the nail will find comfort hiding from and relying on their own abilities to succeed, thus hindering their chances to fulfill their calling in life.

And thirdly we have "Nails who THINK they are Hammers". These are men that talk like hammers and act like nails.  They have so many plans of being authoritative and successful leaders, yet they end up giving into the pressures of the world/people around them.  Their hammer-like tendencies only arise when pushed over the edge, while their nail-like tendencies are used to escape everyday reality. They talk the talk but have a tough time walking the walk.  When paired up with a nail, the two will make an ordinary couple going through the motions of an ordinary life.

My Mairne is definitely a Hammer.  Being married to one, I find myself categorizing most men unconsciously as  Hammer, Nail and Confused. =)  I have to constantly remind myself that we are all creations of God and we are all created as perfect in God's eyes. 
There are pros and cons to being married to a Hammer, and I know for a fact not all women are wired to put up with it.  My world is peaceful because most people choose to keep a distance from my Marine.  They know not to mess with him, and the ones that do tend to learn a hard lesson.  At first it was difficult to survive the rules at home, but once I took the time to understand the reasons behind them my life started to change.  The rules are simple. It provides security, structure, discipline, boundary and lots of room for growth.
A Nail by nature, I am very proud to be married to a Hammer.  Life as I know it, is simply beautiful and filled with love. I can honestly admit that I too am living life to the fullest and enjoying every bit of God's blessing in the process.

So here are a few thought provoking questions for men/women reading this blog - What kind of a person are you?  What kind of a man/woman are you looking for? What kind of a man/woman are you married to?


Mrs. Sgt. P.